I’m doing work,
But then my fingers start twitching
And I feel like an addict.
I need my crutch,
My phone and its distractions
To fill me up somehow.
The quiet is unpleasant and daunting
And I deceive myself into thinking I’m multitasking
When I pick it up.
But then a snapchat message comes up
I look at it and reply,
I scroll through my Instagram feed searching for inspiration
It’s 2 hours later and no work is done.
What’s worse is I feel tired even though I have done absolutely nothing.
I’m on public transport alone
And afraid to be caught looking at someone.
So they don’t think I’m some weirdo who just stares at strangers.
I look outside and try to be enthusiastic about what I’m seeing
But then I get bored and once again I can’t stand the silence.
I put my earphones on and let the music transport me
And I wait till I get to my destination.
However, when I do get to my destination
I feel like I have missed out on something or maybe someone
In my attempts to fill up the silence.